How Exactly to Get Ready for the First Time?
The mixed feeling before having sex for the very first time is a rollercoaster of emotions; it is a mixture of happiness, excitement, and nervousness. While you may have heard or read things about it, you have no idea what your first time will be like. So, here are a few tips to make your first time more fun and a little less intimidating.
1. Keep Calm and Don’t Feel Pressurized to Have Sex
One of the best things you can do to ease your nerves prior to having sex for the very first time is taking a hot shower with some scented shower gel. This will help you relax and freshen you up. You can have some herbal tea to help you calm down.
However, the most crucial thing is to not feel compelled or pressured to do it. If you do, it will not be the intimate and passionate experience it should be. It is not advisable to do it unless you’re into it both emotionally and physically.
2. Let Things Move at Their Own Pace
Sometimes, couples can be unsure about having sex. If that is the case with you, take a deep breath, and know that it’s okay. Relax and let things move at their natural pace. Watch a movie together, cuddle, hug and talk. After that, you will know whether you want to take things further or not. There is nothing wrong with postponing sex if you don’t feel like it or if you’re feeling tired.
3. Don’t Expect Your First Time to Be Mind-blowing
If you decide to go for it, be ready for what to expect. It will not be perfect or mind-blowing as shown in films and sitcoms. Remember that, given that this is your first time, you both will probably be confused and awkward about what to do.
The key is to communicate and be honest about how you feel. If you are at ease, you will be able to make your partner feel comfortable. There may also be some pain and blood. So, be prepared for it.
4. You Should Keep the Tools Handy
There are a few things that you might need while having sex for the very first time, e.g. condoms, tissues, and lubricant. It’s also a good idea to keep a shirt or robe handy if you feel shy or self-conscious while getting up.
5. Talk and Foreplay
Before having sex for the very first time, you should discuss your likes and dislikes with your partner. Exchange information about what turns you on and what is off-limits. It is a good idea to decide on a safe word, which either of you can use in case you are uncomfortable or want to stop. You can engage in foreplay to ease the tension and build the mood. This way, your body will react to the situation and lubricate itself for the next step.
Be patient and sensitive with your partner. Even if you have to stop or take a break in the middle of the situation, you can get back to it when you are both ready.
6. Lube Yourself
It’s a good idea to keep a lubricant at hand, as it is likely you will need it. You can use as much lube as required. However, make sure that it is from a safe and trusted brand, water-based, and quite slippery. Do not use oils as lubricants. They break down the latex in the condoms and cause tears.
7. Expect to Feel Some Pain
Many women worry about feeling pain while having sex for the first time. The amount of pain women feel during sex varies from woman to woman. Some women don’t feel any pain, while others may find it very painful.
Best Position for First Time Sex
1. Spoon Position
The spoon is one of the best positions for first time sex, especially for those who are of a shy or nervous disposition. In this position, the partner who is being penetrated should be lying on their side with the other partner who is penetrating lies behind them, allowing for the latter to enter the former from behind.
This can be an extremely intimate and romantic position, with you being in your partner’s embrace the whole time, and it allows a lot of touching of the important erogenous zones.
2. Dragon Position
The dragon position is another one that is extremely convenient for first-timers. While a person is in this position, the person who is being penetrated usually lies on their stomach with a few pillows inserted under their pelvis, while the penetrating partner lies on top of them, mimicking their position and enters them from behind. This position is much more sensual and erotic, with circular motions rather than the usual fast, pounding movements.
It is one of the best positions for first time sex, as it allows you to experience the sensation without any deep cervical stimulation. If you are a man, this position will help you please your partner without testing your stamina.
3. Cowgirl Position
The cowgirl position is another great first-time position since it allows the penetrated partner to stay in control of the speed and depth of penetration - which means that they can find out what works for them and adjust it to suit their own pace. This position also allows you to view and explore each other’s bodies in an erotic manner.
4. Missionary Position
Although seen as the most ‘vanilla’ position, the missionary position has tremendous appeal for first-timers, and it is most definitely an extremely great position to start your sex life. With your partner lying on their back and you on top, you can gaze into each other’s eyes and feel more at ease with each other.
Best Position for Losing Virginity
You get all the benefits of the cowgirl position (controlling the speed, angle and depth) with a little bonus. “Leaning forward allows more pressure on the clitoris and can make it easier to reach peak pleasure,” says Hilliard. “Don’t freak out if you become disconnected, that happens. Just reinsert and resume.”
What Does Sex Feel Like?
Depending on your emotional and physical connection with your sex partner, sex can feel heavenly. You may feel a little tension as your partner’s penis enters your vagina (if you’re a woman), and the walls of the vagina stretch to meet and accommodate it. However, sex is a wonderfully intimate experience, and the added pleasure of foreplay which includes nipple sucking, love bites, and caressing each other, takes it to another level.
For a man, the feeling of entering an aroused vagina would be extremely stimulating since it is already warm and ready from sexual foreplay, and its tightness would allow him to reach the height of pleasure when he thrusts inside. A similar thing can be said of oral or digital sex between lesbians or anal sex between two gay men.
How to Have Sex First Time?
Comfort is the foremost thing. The more relaxed you and your partner are, the more you will enjoy the experience, even if it is confusing and awkward. Start by giving each other playful massages and let it snowball into more erotic foreplay.
Then, with the increase in intensity, get to the point where you are ready to penetrate or be penetrated. If you’re too nervous, use a lubricant to smoothen the process.
Best Condom for First Time
The best condom for first-timers would be the ultra-thin ones. Ultra-thin condoms are extremely popular among beginners because they fit on the penis like a second skin, which means that there is no compromise on sensations and intimacy.
Durex Feel Ultra-thin and Moods Ultra-thin both are hugely popular condoms. These give a very realistic feel and don't make the wearer uncomfortable.
How to Avoid Painful Sex
The answer to this is lubrication. You should lubricate your vagina and anus(if you plan to have anal sex) if you want your first time to be a painless one. Also, make sure to engage in lots of foreplay so that your body self-lubricates and is ready.
Most Painful Sex Position
Truth be told, the most painful sex position depends solely upon you and your comfort. Many people say that the standing 69 position is the most painful sex position since it gives you cramps, and you’re also likely to fall down on the floor. The reverse cowgirl position can also be painful.
Summing up
To sum up, the best sex positions are undoubtedly the missionary, spooning or cowgirl for first-timers. They provide maximum pleasure while enhancing the experience and making sex less intimidating.
FAQs
What Happens When You Do Sex for the First Time?
You can feel anxious and nervous and not do it properly. But fret not, it is perfectly normal. Just relax and remember that things can only get better with practice.
Why Do Females Feel Pain During First Time Intercourse?
Females experience pain because sex, when done for the first time, results in the breakage of the hymen, which leads to pain and bleeding. Remember to use a lubricant to minimise the pain.
